How often have you looked at the world today and wondered how the upcoming generation is going to get through all that life is currently offering?
I raised two daughters this lifetime and the pressure to succeed in school, the pressure of competitive sports and events, often left them and myself in exhaustion. And looking back I truly had no guidelines. I was a mother who didn't understand the bigger spiritual picture and energy awareness that is very prevalent in society at this time. I truly did my best with what I had in my parenting toolbox.
I am excited about my guest this week who has written an amazing book called A Parenting Revolution for Higher Evolution.
Her name is Julie Phillips Hatch and she is a holistic parenting coach. She has 30 years of experience as a pediatric nurse practitioner. She left Western medicine to pursue traditional Chinese medicine, including Acupuncture and herbal remedies. Her parent coaching practices stems from her studies and experience in eastern Chinese medicine. Her book truly is a provocative read for consciously awakening parents who are searching for an easier way to raise your kids in today's complex, high pressured, rapidly changing world.
The current direction of kids health with rising rates of depression, anxiety, demands that something's changed and how we raise our kids. Besides right now, something isn't working and today, Julie is here to shed some big light on how to embrace your children and their mission in an amazing new way.
Insights to add to your spiritual toolbox from this episode:
1. Opening up consciously and supporting our children
2. Young children being affected by the environment around them
3. Life changing trip to Brazil
4. The 5 elements and how they relate to your child
5. Fear based parenting
6. Anxiety being contagious
7. Giving kids the space to grow and expand
8. Seeing your child as a light
9. Connecting with yourself first and then your children
10. Book- A Parenting Revolution for Higher Evolution
Purchase her book A Parenting Revolution for Higher Evolution.
Visit her website. Check out her on YouTube. Her Podcast Mums on a Mission.
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at the world today and wondered how the upcoming generation is going to get through all that life is currently offering? I myself raise two daughters this lifetime. And at that time, which was about 10 to 15 years ago, the pressure to succeed in school. The pressure of competitive sports and competitive events, often times left them and myself in exhaustion. And looking back I truly had no guidelines. I was a mother who didn't understand the bigger spiritual picture and energy awareness that is very prevalent in society at this time. I truly did my best with what I had in my parenting toolbox. But I am excited about my guest today who has written an amazing book called A Parenting Revolution for Higher Evolution. Her name is Julie Hatch and she is a holistic parenting coach. She has 30 years of experience as a pediatric nurse practitioner. She left Western medicine to pursue traditional Chinese medicine, including Acupuncture and herbal remedies. Her parent coaching practices stems from her studies and experience in eastern Chinese medicine. Her book truly is a provocative read for consciously awakening parents who are searching for an easier way to raise your kids in today's complex, high pressured, rapidly changing world. The current direction of kids health with rising rates of depression, anxiety, demands that something's changed and how we raise our kids. Besides right now, something isn't working and today, Julie is here to shed some big light on how to embrace your children and their mission in an amazing new way. So hey, let's join in the conversation Okay, Welcome Julie, I am so excited to have you here today. Thank you, Teresa. Thank you for having me. I am really excited to be here. Well, okay, so I just finished a book recently on a trip I was on and first thing I want to say about this is my kids are 26 and 28. And if I had this book, and also if I had the understanding of the bigger spiritual picture awareness that goes along with this book, this book is a life game changer for parents and children. Well, thank you. I like to think so also. And it's not for everybody because it's all their spirituality and awareness and mindfulness and but that's where I'm hoping we're all going eventually, someday to a higher, you know, higher evolution is what I call him the name of the book and that we become more aware and conscious of ourselves and the world and especially our kids and what they need from us. I 100% believe that that is the way we're trending. I mean in everything out there all the people who are of service who are moving forward, this beautiful book. It's all part of the of the transformation, all part of the ascension of where we're moving to as a collective energetically. So I want to dive into a bit about the about children and about where they're at now and how we can help them evolve through some of the beautiful aspects you have in this book because it is is chock full it's a small book, but it's it's absolutely chock full of amazing aspects of dealing with your children. So first, let's talk about cycles of life. Let's talk about that in those first really important cycles that um, that children are affected by the parents they live with. So would you like to share a little bit about the cycles of life? Yeah, certainly. I think that I have said in the book that the first eight years eight zero or even before in utero, even really, they are affected by us and their environment. But certainly, from birth to about age seven or eight is the most important time in somebody's life and people you know, parents, just think that your baby's there to be fed and change the diaper and they're but they're not they are they are just soaking in everything in their environment. And so what you provide as a parent in their environment, the energy you create the things that you say, the things that you don't say the nonverbal communication is all really important and they are they're soaking it up. They are they're just taking in everything that you are. And so we want to bring our best selves forward to model great aspects of ourselves for our kids. And then once they get so we have huge influence we have that's our most influential time is I think up until age eight about and then when they go off to school, then they have the influence of friends and teachers and friends parents and so they so the influence gets diluted. And then of course when they get to be high school we have pretty much no influence. We do have some influence. But as all those years before teenager notice that we really have an impact but definitely the first seven to eight years. And I often hear parents say oh my god, I was you know, I did this and did that during the first seven eight years but to at least be aware of it and and it's never too late to turn on the mindfulness and the compassion and the conscious, conscious living with your kids. Oh, I can also relate to that, Julie because that now that my kids are older and I'm in a different place spiritually and more awake. I often call myself a hot energetic mess when they were younger. And I know that energetically I was feeding off of them. They were feeding off of me. We were feeding off of dad. It was a whole conundrum and we're like maybe you know, a pot filled with just stirring constantly of emotions and things going on and where people were at spiritually and energetically. And it was, yeah, it was a really hard time but I also looked at it like I was just, I dealt with and worked with what I had at that moment. Yeah, absolutely. So I can't be hard on myself because I was where my soul was at at that moment. I wasn't open and awake yet but it's okay and they'll grow and live and learn from it too. Do you believe that also? Yes, definitely. I imagine that your kids have come out probably really very nice young men, women, whatever they are. They probably did just great with what you were what you did. And we do it everybody just does the best job they can and so that's one of my not so pronounced message. But an important message is that parents, mothers, especially mothers, but parents need to give themselves a break. Just know that you're doing the best that you can. Nobody's perfect. Nobody's perfect and no parents shouldn't think that they can be perfect. We don't have all the answers for our kids. We just do the best that we can. And if you have to start with a big open heart and a desire to do the best that you can for your kids, then that's that's a good start. Definitely, and I know you've been on a journey yourself and unfolding all of this and moving into traditional Chinese medicine. So I'd like to talk a little bit about how you got to where you are right now and the transformational medical mission you took to Brazil that kind of sparked all of this. I'd love to hear that. Yeah, that was a that was a big turning point. Didn't feel like a big turning point at the time. But when I look back and see how everything has been influenced it was a big turning point. So I was in I have been in western medicine working in pediatric and neonatal intensive care for over 30 years. And around 15 or 20 years ago, 10 years ago, whatever it was, I had the opportunity I love to travel and I had the opportunity to go and do a medical mission in Brazil to help kids that were being treated for cancer. So I went with a bunch of other Americans, someone or a couple with nurses but not everybody. And what happened there is that I couldn't do anything because I didn't have a license to do anything medical or nursing. I didn't speak the language. So it was not at all what I had envisioned and planned. But I got so much more out of it because I got to see what you can do when you can't speak the language and you can't give medications and IVs and stuff like that. There's so much more holistic healing that you can help with. Really we work more with the parents and the kids. But we did both in terms of massage and all the other alternative modalities that then I explored when I got back from there. And I explored massage and Reiki and Cranial Sacral therapy. Several other things but landed on Acupuncture. And so I left Western medicine and just only now do Acupuncture although certainly I incorporate Western medicine because it's it's in here. There's no denying it and there's definitely a place for Western medicine. I don't deny Western medicine at all. I think of it more as integrative integrating the two of them. So that's what happened was that trip to to Brazil where I had visions of saving the world down there and saving the kids and it's not what happened. It's often interesting how on our visions of what we think someone's gonna look like or play out like is usually never can't kind of you know what we think it's gonna be it's always something a little bit different, but like you said, you gain such knowledge and such experience and that bigger you know, picture of okay, now how do I work with the people that I can't even talk to? Right, a big deal? Yeah, it is a bit and it felt like a subtle deal, but it was like I say it was transformative, definitely set me on the path to traditional Chinese medicine, which I absolutely love. I think it's a beautiful place for it and it works so well with my body. I love Acupuncture and Traditional Chinese Medicine. So I want to dive a little bit into parts of the book. So you talk about the five elements and ways to understand how your children's are one of these elements so I I thought this part was brilliant as well as not only related to children but like relating to other people my life. So can you explain this a little bit for the listeners and of course they can dive in deeper by reading your book but this was really cool to me. Yeah, I love the five elements. So the what the five elements are is a foundation of Chinese medicine, how we treat either emotional problems, psychological problems, physical problems are all based on the five elements in Chinese medicine and they are wood, fire, earth, metal and water. And so what I write about with these elements, types in the book is that our kids, all of us are an element type, but we have a dominant element type. And sometimes if there's a close second, if there's an element type that is also kind of like us we have a supporting element type but there's always a dominant one and we're born with it. And we die with it and is it is us it is just it's there's no changing the element type which is important to know about your kids. There is no changing how they were born, what they came into this world with. So the each of the five element types are are in the book you can take a quiz to find out what element type your child is, and it gets to their element type which is also I call their true nature. Somebody might call it their Buddha nature. I also referred to it as their soul. It is who they are at the core it is what it helps to shape the personality and their temperament. But it is but it's the driving force but the driving energy behind who they are and how they interact in the world and what they like in the world and what enlivens them and what doesn't enliven them, and what stresses them and what makes them feel great. So there's challenges and their motivators. And just by knowing your element type, your child's element type, you have a really good beginning understanding of what makes them tick, basically, and we all think that we and we do we all know our kids, really really well, probably better than anybody else. But this is a way to get a different perspective. A different way to look at your child is more objective. There's no labeling in it. For instance, a lot of would children are labeled as ADHD because they're super, super high energy. But I would much rather call a child or what child than an ADHD or a hyperactive child who is labeling I don't think in that way is very helpful. So it's just another it's a it's a way of looking into your child. And I think of it also as their GPS that their true nature is what was what if they can listen to it and understand what their true nature is it can guide them in the direction that they should be going in life. Because they're born with this nature, their inner essence I also there many names for it, but it's all it's what's in here. It's not what's out here or what they look like or the grades that they get it's what's in here it was something else I was gonna add but I Oh, so it's also helpful to them like you say you do it for your yourself so there are other if you have more than one child then you can look to see parenting doesn't it's not one size fits all. If you have more than one child you know that different kids require different things from you as a parent so you can see how the different element types interact together. But problems might arise what works well together. Same with the parents or grandparents or whoever is is interacting with your child. It's just a it's fun to and it's really I don't know, I just find it really helpful. I found it really exciting. It's something that I hadn't seen before in other books or any other teachings. So I thought it was a really great way and I found out what my children were when I went through. I was like, wow, that's super cool. And I also feel that like I said, it's just a great way to you know understand how people are and that different unique soul that lives in our bodies because that's to me is a big deal is when I come through it like like my mom and dad. I'm nothing like them. I mean I have parts of them but I'm nothing like them. And even my mom will say to me, you know you've always been very directed and very focused and you want to leave home when you were young. Yes, I was like I came in go and I'm on a mission from God and I'm you know, I need to get on with this right? Standing our children that they are unique souls, and we just contracted to help them come in that they've got like you said the GPS in their intuition they've got you know that the beautiful elements of what really makes them up and honoring that and understanding how they roll. So they're not going to be like me, they're going to be like them and how do I work with that? That's what I found beautiful about your book is that that really bigger picture of how do I work with this soul as a child because it's really just a wise soul in a young body? Yeah, very true. And when they Yeah, and when they are the younger they are the I think the closer the surface the soul is it's easier to see and they come in pure pure and then they get tainted as he go through life. But yeah, so the younger the younger they are the easier to figure out what their element type is. And yeah, the big picture of what what they are meant to be doing, what they are designed, what God designed them or the the great source or whatever you want to call it design. them to do with their lives. And so, if we can honor that and nourish that and respect that and not in force, not push our will certainly our values Yes, but not our expectations or ideas of how they should be or how we think they should be or how we want them to be, which is so common for parents to do it just unless unless they're right in line unless their element is right in line with what you want. Great, but oftentimes, it's not usually is not and so it's doing them no favors at all to try to turn them make them be or do something other than what they're meant to do or be. Right exactly. And another thing I really want to touch on is fear based parenting because right now where we're at as a collective and I you know if I look back it's probably always been there spent always a fear based parenting but now it's so pronounced and I'll say that because I was going through the airports recently, Julian, I want to I saw this dad holding this baby he must have been to and the fear that this little kid had in his face. I mean, I was like, it almost took my breath away. I was like how it was just made me so sad because the fact that he wasn't like down, you know, running around with his dad, he was really close in. And I saw and felt because I'm very sensitive. Other children as I was moving through the airport with this fear, which to me, it stemmed from obviously the collective energies but also their parents. Yeah. So I'd love for you to talk about that. And I know in the book, it really talks about you know, keeping the kids close, and how to work with that and giving them their space. So would you like would you share a bit about that and how people can really work with what they're feeling as a being and how to not really, you know, try to keep that away from their kids a bit because it's so challenging. Yeah, there's certainly a lot of anxiety in the world these days and adults and kids and I cause I call anxiety contagious. Because if we're if you as a mother or we as I, as a mother am really anxious your child is going to feed off at this. They're going to just like I had said at the beginning, they pick up everything so they're gonna say, Oh, well, anxiety is the way to function because that's how mom gets through life. And it's so that's just anxiety. So and fear based parenting comes from anxiety and or produces anxiety. And I read a good book The coddling of the American mind, children or something like that. And the fear based parenting came from back I think in the 80s. Maybe maybe before that, where a child went missing, and that was when the pictures on the side of the milk cartons started showing up. And what actually was true from what this book says, and they did a lot of research. One, maybe two kids in I don't know decades and decades actually did go missing but it was made such an uproar and it was just so of course nobody wants to have that happen to their kids. But it just it just magnified a tiny, tiny little occurrence and made it into a book way out of proportion. So I think still stemming from that parents are reluctant or afraid to give their kids freedom and kids need their freedom. This also leads me into the similar topic of free range play, letting kids go certainly keeping them safe. age dependent, developmental level dependent, but let them go and explore let them go out and get play in the mud puddles that don't go out and you know, get dirty and climb trees and run risk. They need to run risk. Safe risk, well, depending on the age maybe not so safe risk they need to they need to be able to figure out the risk levels. And so when kids are allowed to, for one thing play outdoors, without a whole lot of adult interruption, that itself was good. Outdoor free play is really good. But when you get a bunch of kids together that are encouraged to play together without an adult saying okay, this is what you guys are going to do. This is how you're going to play even structured baseball or structured sports. They're really good for kids. Absolutely. But it's not the same as free play or unstructured play. When the when there's no adults, saying this is what you guys gonna be doing or watching and monitoring and controlling what goes on. That doesn't that's not the same thing. So free range. Play free play, helps some with with social skills that kids aren't getting so much anymore these days and these social skills include working together cooperation, making rules and then enforcing the rules without an adult saying this is the rules but but the kids do it. Cooperation compromise they learn how to give and take. They learn like I say how to set the rules. resolve conflicts. They breed see that there are other divorce or other points of view that there are other kids that have other ideas as to how things should be done. So there's a whole bunch of it's, it's it's a whole bunch of so nuanced social skills that are learned that way. And so that's kind of a big, long answer for fear based parenting. But I just feel really strongly and I think that there's a move coming back to encourage free lunch play, let your kids run around and and experience life more than what we've been doing. And so I'm jumping on that bandwagon. I feel I'm I love that bandwagon, Julie and what it reminds me of is well I grew up I was born in 1968. So I grew up where we went outside we played mom didn't know where I was at when till you know the dark dark. We ran home and we were all over the place and I got into troubles and I had to learn about those troubles and I got to spank in or I mean like all the things that you know, that was really that free range growing up and just learning how to kind of adapt and things like that. That's really important that nowadays, it's all about keeping him in the house. Keep me a man don't don't go here. I'm scared and yeah, it's just a whole and it's what's interesting to me. It didn't take that long. For it to shift. I know right now that's really weird, right Julie? What's that about? Yeah, I don't know what shifted. I think that parent I don't know if they just need to feel like they have to have control. Well, part of it perhaps is. It's hard for parent Well, this is a little bit of a different kind of a topic, but it's hard for parents to see their kids struggle. It's hard to see their kids, you know, come in last and the real. They just it's hard to see the kids have a hard time and so we want to make things easy for them. We want to clear the path and make it so they don't fall down and go boom and get hurt. But in fact when they're in or when they're growing up, that is the time to let them experiment and fall down and fail and be humiliated and be all those horrible things. It's horrible to watch your kids go through, but that's the time for them to do it because they have the support of parents at home still when you're, you know 25 and 30. You're you don't have your parents really to pick you back up and brush you off and say okay, go ahead and try again and encourage them to but so they need the bumps in the road. That's what builds confidence is what builds resilience. You need to go do you need to go through the ups and downs if all you have is UPS all you have is good things and protection. You're missing out on half of life one thing and it does it does it cripples them to not let them experience and go through the ups and downs. Do you know what comes my mind too if we talked about this, Julie is that it stems back to the parents like the parents have to do their work to so I know this you know this is a spirit. This is a spiritual podcast right? So I'm hoping that the people my listeners, they're out there doing their own personal work also and then sharing that with other people that aren't but maybe need some support. Because it stems back to us and what how we do things and so I recall in the book, you talked about parents doing homework, and I had heard of this I didn't do ever do that for my children. But I had heard of parents that did like the projects and the homework for their kids and what did they learn they learn nothing the children learn nothing but the fact that well, Mom's gonna do my thing so I don't have to do it. I mean, it's and that to me just blows my mind I can imagine of like my mom and dad were like, you know, Monica, do your homework. You know, go survive, kid. I mean, it was so different. Yeah, I saw I saw a lot of friends, people and parents of my kids that did that they and it just it. It really amazed me and you know why? It's just a project you know what's so you get an A in this perfect project that your parents did, so? I don't know. I didn't get it either. But yeah, it's our job to support our kids nourish them in the way that there's that they are inclined to go and that their Buddha Nature directs them in. And so it's it is the bigger picture. It's not the micromanaging. The micromanaging isn't going to do them any favors, and it's really not important. And I also think that when you parents, your child's true nature, when you can sort of let go and say well, yeah, let go and say not micromanage and not control. It's really makes parenting a lot easier. Because when you're trying to make them be a certain way, and they're fighting against that. And they're saying no, that's not me. Or whatever, whenever there's conflict whenever you're forced trying to make something happen, it's just so much easier to say okay, I think that really they're supposed to be doing such and such a thing. They say that they really want to take music lessons or they really don't want to take music lessons. Whatever it is. We want to listen to them and honor their what they're trying to tell us their communication with us. Obviously, there are caveats to that and there's exceptions and all that but in general, I think that it's our job to help them along with what they feel is feels good inside to them. Definitely. Another thing I really liked about your book Julius I like the you had some practices in the book besides of course the the beautiful element one but one that really stuck out to me which I thought oh my gosh, I need to do that with everybody is when you practice seeing your child as a light that was so I got chills just telling you that I mean, I just loved it. I'm like, Why? Because I like to see people's soul to soul. You know, like and work with people soul to soul, even children, soul to soul. But that practice in itself was just so beautiful. Would you like to can you share a little bit about that? Yeah, it's like you say it's seeing your child as a light is so easy that we see as a soul. I really thought about this recently. I also want to see fireflies I see fireflies as like little souls coming into the dark. But so see look trying to see your child for close your eyes and picture them as a light like a color maybe that you see them as their favorite color. And try not to see their their form. Try to see the soul that is inhabiting their form and try not to listen to their voices or what they're saying, but just to see them as a light because it's there and again, I think that the younger they are the easier it is to do that they are just they are and it just it comes from here comes from their third chakra I think their chakra. Well. Yeah. So yeah, just to try to look deeper into them rather than the superficial let's we focus so much on the superficial and this is the deeper the deeper stuff, the differently what they're made up of. Without a doubt going to that soul essence of who that child is. I love the fact that you can appreciate that that makes me really happy. Oh without a doubt. 100% And the other thing I really want to touch on is empathy and compassion and how you have you bring that into the book and share about I like the aspect when like you know you bring a children into say a play area and one a couple are crying and then the rest cry and then and how does that work out? So I'd love for you to share a little bit about being in harmony in your inner nature and that's in harmony with your outer nature with with your children. So, with me you mean with parents being in tune with their own inner nature? Yeah. When you are in tune with your own inner nature it's for one thing is easier to connect with your child's inner nature. And I like to stress the point of understanding your child compassion for your child. But also I don't know if this is what you're referring to, but also not needing the external stuff for vital for validation for self worth. And so if we can do that for ourselves, everything that I talked about in the book we really need to be able to do for ourselves first before we can or as we're doing it with our kids but so to get to help our kids get their validation their self worth from within that we can also help to communicate to them rather than from the clothes that they wear or the bank account that they have materialism which I think is just getting to be more and more of a problem in the world today's materialism and it's more important to connect and to connect with your own soul and their soul more than the more than the materialistic stuff. So I guess I would say that this book a parenting revolution for higher evolution, raising resilient, responsible, compassionate kids from the inside out, really is a beautiful essence of how to raise these children in a new way as a soul and relating to them in that way. It's a beautiful book, Julie and I'm so happy you came on today. I want to talk one more thing about your mom's on a mission podcast because you have a beautiful podcast too. And I'd love you to share a bit about that. Oh, thank you, Teresa. Yep, I don't know. It's moms on a mission with Julie hatch. And it's really pretty much this is kind of over everything in couples. This is a message that I've wanted to get out there to really help the kids of the world but to help the kids we really have to help the parents. So the podcast talks with other people like minded people like I'm talking with you who are like mine, it was just so gratifying and satisfying. But it's about kids in general but many different aspects. People come in and talk about intimacy after the kids are born. A lot of a lot of people are talking about different ways of looking at relationships. Stay at home mothers have parents and things like that. So it's a really it's a it's a very comprehensive they're really great, great cast that I have on that show. And right now it's on I'm taking a break from it because I'm doing a lot of podcasts interviewing on podcasts, but it was a good show. It will come back. So it's Julie hatch, mom's on mission and it's on my actually my website. That's okay, if I do this, Theresa, the book you can find on my website and podcasts and blogs are all on my website. And that website is Julie Phillips hatched.com. And I promised to have that in the show notes so everyone can go right to the show notes and click right on that and go right over and get a copy of this amazing book and and check out what Julie's got going on. So thank you so much, Julie for coming on today. It has been an absolute pleasure and I absolutely love the book. My pleasure. Thank you so much for having me and I'm so glad that you enjoyed the book that makes me feel really, really good.